Everything started on the 10.02.2017. I have been 7 days in Germany. In the morning i wanted to take a hot shower after my alarm started going off (i hate my alarm especially, if it rings at 7 o clock).

We left the window open the entire night and since it was snowing outside, it was freezing cold inside the next morning by the time we woke up. I was naked, jumped under the shower and after like 2 mins of cold water, i knew something was wrong. I froze my ass off in about 5 degree water temperature. You can imagine how much fun that is, if you are used to Tenerife temperature. I’m getting sick of Germany already.

First thing that popped into my head was, that i had to go and check the heater and see what’s up, because the entire house was cold too, not just the shower. So i went into the heater room, checked everything but i have to tell you guys, i wasn’t the smartest guy back in school. More of a combination of lazy and just doing, what i needed to do (i was young). I hope everybody had that time in their life, otherwise i need to feel lonely with that.

So i checked everything, didn’t understand anything, so i decided to call the number, that has been posted on the heater. He came pretty fast and fixed the problem. The only problem was, that in order to work, i needed drive to Krefeld/ Münster for a meeting with a new sponsor for 2017. So i came back in the evening and i finally took a hot shower, but because a girl was showering before, there was’t any hot water left for Marius after a couple of minutes. We are doing everything for the ladies.

So finally i slept well in a warm house, had a wonderful night with that girl and the next morning, when she was waking up and making me coffee, i was thinking about trying to be a tough guy and jumping into the pool of my dad. The pool had about 2 degrees. For outside pools in Germany you need to open up the top with a spindle-role.

So by the time i got naked and stood next to the open pool with my feet touching the edge of the pool, i decided it’s probably the better choice to not get sick from jumping into the pool just to show off and impress a girl. I’d rather show her that i am smart. Some people can call me a pussy, but the real strength comes from the brain and the hearth. So i close the pool again by spinning the role. Because it of all the rain and snow from the past couple of days that got gathered in the top, it got stuck half the way through, causing the entire electricity to go down with it. I simply though i could fix it, by just putting everything back to the way it was before. I was actually thinking, it’s going to be easy, but of course it wasn’t. It was my failweekend, so it was clear to me, that it couldn’t be so easy. I checked every single box in the house (we talk about like 3 electric boxes), i turned everything off and back on again. The problem was, that it never stayed on, it would always turn itself back off again. I was confused, didn’t know, what to do first and the house was getting cold again after 2 hours. Of course we had no heater again (i was thinking to myself: „Why the fuck do i have so much luck and what will the girl think about me, how unlucky or stupid am i?“). So i called the electric company to come around and check the problem, but no one had time. After i wasted like 30 euros of money with my Spanish cellphone, i started calling around in Germany to get somebody, that can help me.

Finally, after 3 hours of searching, i found somebody, but he was only available to come around at 8 a clock.
Since we had 5 a clock, there was plenty of time left, so i decided to just make a small fire and go on working on internet pages, looking for some flats and houses. I was checking out some flights, in order to maybe book a new one 3 days later.

All those problems with the electricity and the heater costed me so much time, that by the time my dad was screaming on the cellphone, i was actually feeling really bad, without even doing anything, that cause those problems to happen. He blamed me for „destroying“ his house.

So finally after 3 hours of working and many times asking myself, at what time the guy might arrive, he finally came to fix it. It was 20:35 Saturday evening and i in my head there was this one guys coming and fixing everything for 10-15 bugs. In reality two guys in my age came to my house and since i didn’t even had enough candles to light the house, so they got some flashlights. (It has been 6 hours of no electricity). I show them the main electricity box and i couldn’t believe what happened! He did the exact same thing i did all day one time with his magic hands and the whole fucking house work. I was so sad. I give him 10 euros, said thanks and bye. He wasn’t even more than 3 minutes in the house and that, just because he wanted to check if the lights go out again and nothing happened, everything was perfect. I felt so bad and stupid and all of that in front of a girl. Whatever, she think i am super dumb, i can’t change the situation, so i decided to take care of the heater on the next morning. We had electricity back, but the heater didn’t work. Sunday morning i was chilling in the cold house. After trying to call somebody that can help, thinking about calling the same guy from Friday, i decided to go for it. At this point i have nothing to lose, since everyone already thinks that i am an idiot! (I don’t give a fuck what the world thinks about me)
At around 10 AM i had an appointment with the parents from that girl……. oh no.

She forgot, that we should actually be meeting the family for breakfast already at 9:30. So this was the first time, that we came too late. Well done…
We came at 10:15, because she needed to smoke a puff from a hand rolled cigarette. I mean i am not good at rolling but that hand rolled cig was really ugly and it looked like a bean.
So her mom and she weren’t talking at all and i was feeling like i was getting into the jail, because of all the questions her dad were asking me. You guys can’t imagine how it feels to talk for one hour and eat one bread, just because it was a really uncomfortable situation. I drank my coffee almost black and i hate it that way. It was even without sugar. I thought the day couldn’t get worse, but later i would recognize, that what i had said, wasn’t smart. (never say it can’t get worse… NEVER NEVER NEVER)

I went into the golf club office, worked for like 4 hours on the computer and was fixing problems by doing plenty of calls. I was thinking about how i can make more money, how to sell my old kites better, about all the sponsor contacts and what is good for me right now.

Meanwhile i got a message from my blond little brother Julius back, so i talk to him and ask, if he has time to go iceskating. He told me, that he would love to, but he still got a bit of pain in his arms from parcours. I asked him, if he is a man, advised him, that if he takes it easy there won’t be a problem and told him that sports is way more important then going to the movies. After finishing my last call, I went home to pick my brother. He gave me a big welcoming hug, it was good to finally See him again.
We went iceskating after and had lots of fun playing catch, even though I had an advantage, because I used to play ice hockey. He tried hiding behind people, when he suddenly lost his balance and fell forward on his already hurt arm. He started crying and reminded me very much of myself when I was younger, I used to get a cut in the same spot over and over again. He didn’t feel like going to the Hospital and after 5 minutes the small crybaby was fine and wanted to go back on the ice. Instead I convinced him to get popcorn from the nearest cinema and head home, if the pain did start coming back we would go straight to the hospital.

He didn’t want to go, because it didn’t hurt so much anymore, so i bring him home, where the nanny was already waiting to take care of him. (I felt so bad, he just had pain because i asked him to come…) I had to drive back at home, the guy already called me to repair the heater.

2 missed calls, because the music was too loud on the ice… I was driving straight back to my house, when i saw, that i had just 60 km of gas left, so i put 30 euros in the car. After that, i was driving 40 in the city. My car stopped to drive i stood in the middle of the street. Everywhere were cars around me, but i still managed to be alone. My day was getting better and better (haha), but i felt like i deserved a little of bad karma, because my brother was in pain for my stupid mistake and i destroyed my dads landrover. Remember it was Sunday evening at 6 o clock, somewhere in the nowhere and i needed to fix that problem i called the girl, but she didn’t pick up.

I was a bit sad and thinking about who else i can call. Maybe some of my dads friends could help and after finally somebody picked up and he gave me a number from a guy that can get the car. I call him in the car still and ask him, if can come and pick it up, he told me, that he’s sorry and still in holidays, but that he would come the next day at 10 o clock pick it up. I was somehow feeling good, but i was scared, that the police would come and get my car, because the landrover had like 2.5 t minimum, so i pushed him on a small parking space. It wasn’t official parking though. When i finally arrived at home, the guy, who wanted to get the car, called me again and asked me, if i left a paper in the window to show the people/police, that we will pick up the car the next day tomorrow and the car had a problem and couldn’t drive. So at 21:30, i had to drive with that girls car and her together to the car and somebody shot, to top all the weekend off, with paintballs on my car.

So my dads Landrover wasn’t just white anymore. Part of it was now red as well. (One day i will find you guys haha) I was fucking done with that weekend, we go to KFC. I just wanted to eat some chicken and because i haven’t had really bad quality in over two years now.

That was my weekend.

Tell me, how was your last weekend? I am wondering, if you have a better story than me…….

By Marius Hoppe
HOPPEAIR

Cheers and i better go to sleep.